Five young people sit at table in coffee shop. One has digital device open. All are laughing and talking and looking at each otherWhen people think about attention-deficit hyperactivity (ADHD), social difficulties are not typically among the first things that come to mind. However, many children, teens, and adults with ADHD often find themselves struggling socially in a variety of ways.

People who have ADHD commonly struggle with the following social issues:

[fat_widget_right]

If you have ADHD and identify with the struggles above, here are some ideas and tools you can use to help improve your social functioning:

  1. Strive to make plans with friends while still with them (i.e., after a movie, look at the calendar and schedule plans for the following week). This may make it easier to sustain seeing friends frequently.
  2. Schedule calendar events at preset intervals to remind you to call friends who live far away.
  3. Don’t commit to plans if unsure you will be free.
  4. If you have to cancel plans, give as much notice as possible and explain why. Offer to reschedule right away.
  5. Practice explaining things or telling stories concisely on your own. Go through what you want to say initially. Then tell it again and try to cut down the amount of time it takes. Next, try to summarize what you want to convey in a few sentences. The more you practice this, the easier it may become.
  6. When telling a story, think about the punchline or end point first. Try working backward.
  7. Practice following multiple people talking in a conversation. For example, watch a television show with scenes where multiple people are talking. Watch it first without sound, then watch with only sound. Finally, watch again with sound and picture. This may help improve your ability to use your different senses in observing social interactions. Write out key points each person is saying and draw a diagram or other visual representation, if needed.
  8. In social situations, always look at the person speaking; watch their body language and facial expressions. If you’re more of a visual person, imagine a line like a spiderweb being drawn back and forth from person to person as they speak. Then imagine a few keywords being displayed above them. Creating visual representations may help you follow conversations.
  9. If you often forget key things discussed, write them down, perhaps in your phone after each social interaction. Then you can refer to them before seeing the person again. For example, if your friend is dating someone or just broke up, make a note about it so you can refer to it for next time.

I hope these suggestions are helpful.

Person wearing headphones sits alone in open office, smiling while working on laptopWhen many people with attention-deficit hyperactivity (ADHD) think about improving their productivity in the workplace, the main thing that comes to mind is creating and maintaining a to-do list. While keeping track of what you do is important, having your office set up in a way that suits your unique needs is vital to success in the workplace. This is true for anyone, but especially so for someone with ADHD, a condition that tends to make it difficult to concentrate and stay on task.

Here are four simple strategies to help those with ADHD create an optimal work environment:

[fat_widget_right]

  1. Get comfortable. To the extent you have control over the furniture and layout, think about your work space. Make certain you have a comfortable, ergonomic chair. In addition to a traditional desk chair, some people find sitting on an inflated exercise ball part of the time or a standing desk attachment to be helpful in reducing fidgetiness. Alternatively, if you don’t like sitting at a desk and aren’t required to, consider other options that may be available to you. For example, some office environments might allow for you to sit on a couch or comfortable reclining chair. In other environments, you may be permitted to mount a large television to the wall in front of you to use as a computer screen, and then use a tray table, lap desk, or similar support item to hold a keyboard and mouse. If you sit with a tray table that is free-standing, make sure the height of it is comfortably proportional to the height of the couch or chair.
  2. Set up stations for different tasks. Spending all day sitting at a desk can be difficult even for people who don’t have symptoms of ADHD. Varying your seating position during the day can be beneficial. If possible, have a chair or couch in the office that you can use to sit at when doing certain tasks (such as reading, organizing papers, making charts, etc.). In addition, if you have a job where you work on a few major projects and have physical materials for them, try to devote a different portion of the room to each one.
  3. Reduce clutter. Having papers piled up on your desk can be distracting and may take away from your productivity. If you need a place to pile papers, it may be helpful to place them on a shelf out of immediate view. Of course, setting up an organizational system where papers are filed regularly so they don’t pile up in the first place would be best. Unless you are using items regularly, keep them off your desk as much as possible. Limit the items on your desk to things you use daily—your computer, perhaps your office phone, and not much else. Having an area within arm’s reach for pens, a stapler, hole punch, etc., may be useful to reduce the frequency of having to get up for supplies.
  4. Stay active. In addition to taking regular breaks, consider small things you can do to stay active while working. For example, using a desk bicycle or elliptical while working may help harness fidgeting while having the added benefit of improving your physical health. Using exercise bands attached to your chair may also be helpful.

Having the optimal work environment, or at least making it as comfortable as possible, is crucial to being successful in the workplace. I hope these suggestions are helpful.

Mother kneeling down and talking to sonChildren with attention-deficit hyperactivity (ADHD) may have an impaired tolerance to being punished, according to a new study published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry. The finding could have implications for several areas of study, including behavior modification and neuroscience.

Children with ADHD often run into problems with people in supervisory positions because of their symptoms. Distractibility, fidgeting, and apparent daydreaming are just a few of many potential behaviors associated with the condition that can be perceived as disruptive and result in punishment from authority figures. The research shows punishment-based behavior correction can have unexpected consequences for children with ADHD.

Measuring Punishment and Reward Sensitivity in Children

The study included 210 children, 145 of whom were diagnosed with ADHD (the rest participated as part of a comparable control group). Each child was placed in front of a computer with two game options visible on the screen at all times. They were then given time in which they could play either game as much (or as little) as they liked. The games were almost identical (the player could gain points as a reward for correct responses), except in one option there was a fourfold greater chance of being punished by having points taken away for giving incorrect answers.

[fat_widget_right]Both groups of children showed a tendency to play the less punishing game more often. This trend remained relatively stable until about 100 trials were completed by each child. At this point, there was a significant increase in the number of ADHD-diagnosed children choosing to play less of the game that had an increased rate of punishment, suggesting children with ADHD tend to avoid punishment more often than children not diagnosed with ADHD.

Motivational Systems in Children with ADHD

Some might say these findings validate persistent punishment as an effective means of behavior control in children with ADHD, but the study’s authors say there are some important caveats to consider. First, punishment is generally not advised as a form of behavior modification due to a high risk of causing more harm than good.

Additionally, the change in behavior (choosing the high-rate punishment game less often) occurred despite the rate of reward staying the same in both games. The researchers say this is not typical of developmentally sound decision-making processes and could indicate a wider problem with the brain’s motivational system in children with ADHD. They may be more sensitive to and focused on punishment, while other children are generally more focused on reward.

The study’s authors suggest frequent rewards and incentives may be an effective way to give children with ADHD what they need to seize opportunities for success, especially if they view a task as requiring a great amount of effort.

References:

  1. Doucette, J., Harris, B., & Jaffe, P. (2014). Educating Canadians on the health risks of corporal punishment and safe and effective alternatives. Health Tomorrow: Interdisciplinarity and Internationality, 2(1). Retrieved from http://ht.journals.yorku.ca/index.php/ht/article/download/40169/36356
  2. Furukawa, E., Alsop, B., Sowerby, P., Jensen, S., & Tripp, G. (2016). Evidence for increased behavioral control by punishment in children with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry. doi:10.1111/jcpp.12635
  3. Hulst, B. M., Zeeuw, P. D., & Durston, S. (2014). Distinct neuropsychological profiles within ADHD: A latent class analysis of cognitive control, reward sensitivity and timing. Psychological Medicine, 45(04), 735-745. doi:10.1017/s0033291714001792

Overhead view of preteen student does homework at kitchen table with school supplies spread aroundMost articles you read about helping children and teens with attention-deficit hyperactivity (ADHD) complete homework are likely to focus on having a structured plan. A structured plan—do homework in the same location, take breaks at specific times, etc.—can indeed be helpful, but often parents underestimate the importance of the actual environment in which the homework is done.

Here are five suggestions to help develop the ideal work environment for your child or teen:

[fat_widget_right]

  1. Make sure the work area is physically comfortable. This means having your child or teen sit in a comfortable chair. Ideally, they should be sitting at a desk or using a lap desk (as opposed to sitting on the floor or bed), but see what works best for them. Using a chair that reclines slightly or is padded may make it easier to sit and focus for longer periods.
  2. If your child or teen fidgets, harness the fidgeting. If they fidget with their legs, for example, provide your child or teen with something to keep their legs occupied. Try a bicycle or elliptical base that fits under a desk; exercise bands attached to the chair; tennis balls cut open and glued to the floor; or large, squishy shoe innersoles attached to the floor. For individuals who fidget with their hands, try something such as attaching a stress ball to a stretchy string that’s connected to the desk. Alternatively, attach something with different textures to the desk so your child or teen can rub their hand against something while working.
  3. Minimize shifting of attention. This can be achieved by decreasing the frequency with which your child or teen needs to switch between their book and the computer, documents on the computer, getting up to get materials, and so forth. To decrease shifting between materials, many individuals (adults included) do well with using a laptop and attaching an external monitor (or LCD television) to it. With two screens, they can keep documents they are referring to on one screen and write on the other. Using a laptop and a tablet for this purpose can also work well, especially if the tablet has a stand. To help with textbooks, using a kitchen book holder that props up the book and keeps it open to set pages can be useful. To avoid children and teens having to get up frequently, keep a few pens, pencils, highlighters, and basic school supplies within arm’s reach.
  4. Reduce visual and auditory distractions. Keep the walls within view fairly plain if possible, and if looking out a window is distracting, face the workspace away from the window. Auditory distractions can be minimized by being quiet around your child or teen, using a white noise machine, or using an app (with or without headphones). Some children and teens like noise while working. If they feel they need to listen to something while working, white noise or music without words might be best. While ideally music should be soft, if your child or teen insists on listening to popular music while working, have them listen to karaoke versions.
  5. Have different work stations for different types of tasks. Some teens may find it helpful to sit in a special chair just for reading, to use a desk for writing papers, and to use a reclining chair for proofreading. Sometimes a change in position or room between tasks can lead to increased focus and reduce fatigue. (For others, of course, it can lead to getting off task more easily.)

There are many things you can do to help your child or teen get their homework done. While a structured plan is key, so too is the setup of the actual workspace. Try the tips above to get the most out of your child’s study time.

Young boy sits with parent at small table and adds activity to calendar on wallMany children and adolescents with attention-deficit hyperactivity (ADHD) have a hard time keeping track of their assignments, after-school activities, doctor’s appointments, and other daily tasks and commitments. Parents, of course, often take on the responsibility of reminding them about these things and making sure everything goes as smoothly as possible. While that certainly helps in the short term and can minimize parenting headaches, providing kids affected by ADHD with opportunities and tools to develop organizational skills is a better long-term strategy.

Helping kids with ADHD keep track of their schedules ideally should begin at a young age with at least keeping them aware of what their schedule is. A large calendar in a common area, a color-coded, hour-by-hour schedule, or a similar item is especially helpful for preschool and elementary school-aged children. Older children and teens may also benefit from calendars on tablets, smartphones, and other portable devices. This can reinforce the idea that technology can be useful as well as fun.

[fat_widget_right]

The following tips are suggested for keeping track of activities on a device:

For younger children and teens, using a whiteboard or some sort of visual list of tasks can be helpful. Older children and teens often benefit from using task lists on electronic devices (provided they have frequent access to them). However, often kids (and adults, too) put items on a task list and forget to check it, so the tasks do not get done. Thus, here are some suggestions for maximizing the effectiveness of electronic to-do lists:

No matter which tools you use to help your child or teen with time management, electronic or otherwise, it is important to help them build organizational skills from a young age that extend beyond you constantly reminding them. Learning not only where to be and what to do, but doing so on their own, fosters feelings of self-efficacy and accomplishment, decreases reliance on parents, and is a core skill they can use throughout their lives.

Young african american woman taking notes for her studyWhile symptoms of inattention and hyperactivity tend to be prominent in any discussion about ADHD, difficulty beginning tasks is another major issue for many individuals with the condition. In fact, in some cases, difficulty initiating tasks is a more visible symptom of attention-deficit hyperactivity than difficulties focusing or sitting still.

Here are four strategies to help facilitate task initiation:

  1. Break down large tasks into parts. Create a schedule of when you will do each part or set a deadline for when each part should be completed. For some individuals, an hour-by-hour breakdown of their day that notes when specific tasks should be completed is the best way to ensure that they get completed. For other individuals, having to follow an hour-by-hour schedule may seem daunting and annoying. Thus, one modification of this strategy is to estimate how long each scheduled task will take and list each part of the task on a piece of paper with the time needed to complete the parts. One can begin tasks at his or her leisure as long as sufficient time is allowed to complete what is needed. This method may be more difficult to follow through on, but having a moderate amount of structure sometimes is enough to initiate completion.
    [fat_widget_right]
  2. Set up motivators that encourage you to complete tasks. For homework or household tasks, forgo watching a television show, playing video games, or doing something else of interest until a specific task is completed. If the task requires running an errand, identify a small reward to motivate you to complete the errand. For instance, if you have to go to the library, tell yourself that if you go, you can treat yourself to frozen yogurt.
  3. Work in an environment consistently associated with work. The setting in which you complete homework or other tasks is important. If completing tasks requiring sustained focus, make sure you are working in a quiet area. Ideally, if you can complete tasks in an area that you use only for this type of work, you can train yourself to focus better knowing that when in that area, you are supposed to be working. If you were to try to complete homework while sitting in front of the television in the family room, chances are you’d be more focused on turning on the TV than working.
  4. Reduce distractions. Switch your cell phone to silent mode, turn it off, or put it in another room. Being tempted to check email, text, open a notification from an app, and so forth will draw your attention away from the task at hand. All the time you take to check your phone and get back on task is wasted time, and it adds up to quite a bit of time if working for a few hours or more.

In general, if beginning tasks is difficult for you, look at what things stop you or get in the way. Are there specific distractions? Is there boredom with the task at hand? Do you have trouble understanding the directions? Something else?

Identifying the causes of your task initiation difficulty and developing behavioral strategies to make it easier to begin tasks will likely lead to greater success with task completion.

holding paper x over mouthAccording to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, as many as one in five Americans will experience a mental health issue at some point in their lives. Of the nearly 60 million Americans who experience mental health concerns each year, many will never seek treatment for a variety of reasons including social stigma, cultural norms, and lack of access. In fact, a recent report published in the journal Psychological Science and the Public Interest found that an estimated 40% of individuals with serious mental health concerns either never receive care or start an intervention program without completing it.

The stigma surrounding mental health issues can be a significant barrier to care. Unfortunately, many people unknowingly contribute to the stigma simply with their everyday language choices. A poor choice of words not only stigmatizes, stereotypes, and creates unrealistic assumptions about certain people, but also can trivialize serious mental health conditions and their accompanying experiences.

While society tends to tread lightly around language concerning disabilities, race, or religion, it seems that we do not apply the same sensitivity to language involving mental health. For example, while you might be a little taken aback by someone who uses the word “retarded” to refer to a poor decision, you likely wouldn’t think twice about someone calling a peculiar behavior “crazy” or saying out loud that someone’s “OCD” is the cause for an orderly office.

Help Us Erode Stigma during Mental Health Awareness Month

With May designated as Mental Health Awareness Month in the United States, we would like to encourage you to think twice about the language you use and how it may affect those one in five people who may be your neighbors, coworkers, and friends who experience mental health issues.[fat_widget_right]

Show respect and consideration for those experiencing mental health conditions by avoiding these common stigmatizing phrases we hear in our daily conversations:

‘I’m So OCD.’

All too often people say “I’m so OCD” when referring to simple habits they may have regarding organization, such as arranging books a certain way on a bookshelf or keeping one’s own environment immaculately clean. True obsessions and compulsions can be quite debilitating, involving persistent, unwanted thoughts, rituals, and behaviors, all of which are out of a person’s control.

As many as 27% of people experience some form of obsessive-compulsive behavior. By using the term to describe tidiness, we popularize the experience and make it appear less severe than it actually can be. Next time you find yourself tempted to say someone else is being OCD or claim it as an explanation for your own behavior, consider how you might more accurately share your observation or insight.

‘I Can’t Focus; It’s My ADD.’

It’s not uncommon to hear people refer to themselves as ADHD or ADD when they are inattentive or easily distracted. Today’s high-tech world seems to be characterized by ever-shrinking attention spans, and it seems that people are always fiddling with their smart phones and jumping from one topic to another. However, this is not the same thing as attention-deficit hyperactivity.

Though these types of behaviors may be related to a lack of focus, an actual diagnosis of ADHD is far more complex.

People might casually refer to distracted behavior as ADHD or even go as far as to say that they’re ADHD when channel surfing or changing the radio station before a song finishes. Though these types of behaviors may be related to a lack of focus, an actual diagnosis of ADHD is far more complex and has less to do with boredom and more to do with genetics, neurotransmitters, and electrical activity in the brain. In fact, a major distinguishing characteristic of ADHD is impulsivity, which probably isn’t present in most cases where people erroneously claim ADHD as the source of their inattention.

‘My Ex Is Such a Psycho.’

At some point, you’ve probably heard someone refer to a past lover (or friend, or roommate) as a psycho. People typically use this phrase to refer to someone engaging in erratic or irrational behavior, which in reality is far from psychotic.

Psychosis is a serious mental health condition by which a person loses contact with reality and may experience hallucinations and delusions. An estimated 3% of people experience psychosis, which makes it far less prevalent than the many people who claim to have psychotic past lovers might indicate. Try not to downplay the seriousness of this condition by using the term frivolously.

‘The Weather Is So Bipolar Today.’

Sure, it may snow in the morning, warm up for an hour, and then snow again all afternoon, but it is impossible for the weather to literally be bipolar. Likewise, it’s highly unlikely that your friend having a few ups and downs today is actually experiencing the often debilitating symptoms of bipolar. Using the term bipolar in these contexts misrepresents the experience and can minimize the condition.

A person experiencing bipolar is likely to experience serious shifts in mood that may range from dangerously euphoric to suicidal. These drastic changes can seriously hinder one’s life if left untreated. Instead of using the term bipolar, consider describing the weather as unstable or unpredictable, and referring to your friend as being in a bad mood or having a hard time.

‘This Makes Me Want to Kill Myself.’

You fail your math exam and you exclaim in frustration, “I just want to die.” Or something else mildly unfortunate happens and you casually say, “This makes me want to kill myself.”

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the United States with almost 40,000 Americans dying from suicide each year. People who commit or attempt suicide do not necessarily want to die; rather, they may want to be free of pain.

If you find yourself upset with your circumstances and wanting to express your frustrations, be mindful of your word choice in this matter. It’s very likely someone in your vicinity has been touched by suicide in some way.

‘Stop Being So Paranoid.’

Paranoia is a symptom of many mental health conditions and can be detrimental to a person’s life. True paranoia can cause people to have serious trust issues and unwarranted fear and anxiety, as well as feelings of persecution and exaggerated self-importance.

When you find a friend may be worrying too much or over-analyzing something, avoid using the term paranoid and replace it with other descriptive words such as mistrusting or fearful.

‘I’m So Addicted.’

You might find yourself saying something like, “I’m so addicted to this TV show” to mean that you really enjoy it. But most likely, you are not truly addicted to it. Addiction is a serious mental health issue that can destroy lives, both of the person addicted and that person’s loved ones.

There’s a considerable difference between appreciating or enjoying something and being addicted to it. Be mindful of this distinction when you speak.

Although more than 23 million Americans experience some form of substance abuse, up to 40 million additional Americans are indirectly affected by it. These numbers do not account for non-substance addictions such as gambling, spending, or sex addiction.

There’s a considerable difference between appreciating or enjoying something and being addicted to it. A person experiencing addiction may want to stop engaging in an addictive behavior, but may feel unable to do so regardless of its continued negative consequences. Be mindful of this distinction when you speak, so as not to disparage the serious problems addiction can cause.

‘That’s Crazy/Insane/Mad/Nuts.’

It’s becoming far too common to use the word crazy and related synonyms lightly. People may think that using these terms to describe behavior that seems odd, eccentric, or strange is harmless, but it can be damaging to the self-esteem of those experiencing real mental health conditions.

The stigma alone is enough to make people feel isolated, keep them from seeking the treatment they truly need, or cause them to completely deny their symptoms altogether. But these terms, often used in a manner that belittles those who actually experience mental health issues, reinforce the dangerous stigma of mental health issues by painting them in a derogatory way.

Words Have Power; Think Before You Speak

Avoiding stigmatizing terms and phrases that cause shame, minimize experiences, and misrepresent reality can help eliminate a major obstacle to treatment. It’s not simply about being politically correct, requiring that you tiptoe around your words; the point is to simply stop and think about what you say and be mindful of how your choice of words may affect others.

If you would like to learn more about how you can raise awareness of mental health conditions and help remove stigma, check out our blog this month or visit Mental Health America for more information and resources about Mental Health Awareness Month.

References:

  1. Corrigan, Patrick. (September 4, 2014). Stigma as a Barrier to Mental Health Care. Association for Psychological Science. Retrieved from: http://www.psychologicalscience.org/index.php/news/releases/stigma-as-a-barrier-to-mental-health-carhtml
  2. Mental Health America. May is Mental Health Month. Retrieved from: http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/may
  3. Mental Health America. Mental Health Information. Retrieved from: http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/mental-health-information
  4. Schumaker, Erin. (April 17, 2015). It’s Time To Stop Using These Phrases When It Comes to Mental Illness. The Huffington Post. Retrieved from: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/17/mental-illness-vocabulary_n_7078984.html

Mother and daughter (8-9) doing arts and craftsChildren with attention-deficit hyperactivity (ADHD) often experience intense emotions, behavioral challenges, and low self-esteem. As a result of these experiences, children with this diagnosis may find it difficult to express their emotions and to develop the capabilities needed to control their behavior. In the short term, these issues can make it difficult for the child to have positive experiences that reinforce a sense of self-esteem and self-efficacy. Over the long term, this can have significant implications for their well-being, success, and motivation.

While standard approaches to therapy including medication and behavioral supports are integral to improving outcomes, alternative interventions such as art therapy have proven to be highly effective for addressing some of the innate challenges encountered by children with ADHD. Alternative therapies for ADHD are often overlooked by parents and educators, but there is a wealth of emerging research suggesting that these tools can be instrumental in helping children address some of the core challenges they face every day. For this reason, parents, educators, and counselors should be open to the possibility of using alternative therapies to support the needs of children with this diagnosis.

[fat_widget_child_counselor_right]

One of the most notable alternative therapies available for the treatment of ADHD is art therapy. Art therapy works in a number of different ways to lessen the impact of many of the negative consequences of ADHD. For instance, art therapy, which utilizes a number of different approaches for nonverbal creative expression, can help children with ADHD channel their intense emotions without engaging in verbal outbursts. This nonverbal form of expression provides an outlet for the child, which can quell behavioral difficulties. As the behavior of the child improves, the child may experience more positive feedback from educators, counselors, and parents. Over time, this may have a significant effect on the child’s self-esteem. As the child gains confidence, his or her behavior will improve dramatically, further reinforcing positive outcomes in all areas of development.

Art therapy has also been shown to increase attention span for children with ADHD by providing a source of focus. Art is a natural part of play in children’s development, and often children with ADHD are able to select art projects that interest them. With an art project of their choice, children with ADHD are given an outlet upon which to focus. Although the duration of attention to the project may increase over several sessions, the process is one that builds the capability of the child with ADHD to channel energy in a positive way that results in accomplishment. This also has an impact on the child’s self-esteem. Often children with ADHD are punished for their inability to pay attention or focus. By teaching this basic skill to children, art therapy can provide an important bridge for utilizing focus and attention skills in the classroom and at home.

Art therapy can also provide a foundation for the child to explore his or her identity. This can be a powerful process, as children with ADHD are often defined by labels and behaviors. For children with ADHD, labeling and attention to negative behaviors can make it difficult for the child to define himself or herself in a positive context. Art can connect the child to an inner identity that is positive and therapeutic. By providing this connection, the child can overcome much of the negativity that encompasses much of the child’s daily experience. In short, art can make a child feel good about himself or herself. Although it may take several sessions for children to experience this outcome, providing the foundation for this type of growth will be imperative for helping the child to achieve a better sense of self.

Even though art therapy is a helpful support for many children with ADHD, it is often not offered by schools or therapists. If you believe that your child may benefit from art therapy, you should ask about this intervention and see if educators or therapists working with your child can help. While art therapy will not replace more traditional forms of therapy provided to your child, it may be an important supplemental resource to help build vital social and behavioral skills that are difficult to teach in therapy. Having this additional support can help your child overcome some of the most common deficits associated with ADHD.

https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/?p=25217Children and teens with attention-deficit hyperactivity (ADHD) often have difficulty in social situations. They may frequently get into conflicts with peers, have trouble developing and sustaining friendships, or experience other social difficulties. In some instances, these difficulties may be due primarily to symptoms associated with ADHD, such as difficulty focusing, resisting impulses, or other self-regulation issues.

Difficulty focusing impedes individuals with ADHD in that they may not hear everything that is being said or otherwise communicated. As a result, they may miss social cues or relevant information to sustain conversations. In some instances, individuals may “zone out” and be perceived by peers as being uninterested. In other situations, children and teens may be focused on what they want to say and not allow peers to fully contribute to conversations and social interactions. Individuals who have trouble managing impulses to say something, trouble sitting still, or difficulty resisting other impulses often struggle in social situations because peers may find certain actions annoying or irritating.

ADHD does not always occur by itself. There are high comorbidities with anxiety, depression, learning issues, and other conditions. Thus, in some instances, symptoms from co-occurring conditions exacerbate the effect that ADHD symptoms have on social interactions.

Here are a few strategies to help your child/teen with social skills:

[fat_widget_child_counselor_right]

Learning and using good social skills is a process, and having a safe environment to practice is important. At the same time, it is vital that any practicing or pointing out of negative behaviors is carried out in a constructive way to avoid any negative impact on your relationship with your child/teen or his or her self-esteem. If you feel that your child/teen is struggling significantly with social skills, seeking out a therapist or counselor or social skills therapy groups can greatly help your child/teen improve on these issues.

That sounds very frustrating. It also sounds like it might be causing you some anxiety, which might be perpetuating the attentional issues you are experiencing. Does this ring true? If so, next time you feel this happening you might want to try taking a few deep breaths, direct your focus to your breathing and then gently remind yourself to focus on the task at hand.

I find myself wondering if your mind is often going to the same thing when it wanders. We all go through challenging times in life that can make it difficult to focus on what we are trying to do in the present moment. For example, if you’ve recently experienced the loss of a relationship, you may find your mind wandering to that person, to memories of time spent together, to sadness about an unknown future, to the fear of loneliness.

[fat_widget_left]

If, however, this issue seems to have no connection to a recent loss or transition in your life, I might wonder if you are feeling bored or restless with where you are in your life right now. Sometimes a difficulty focusing can be an indicator that it is time to shake things up a bit.

It might be helpful to you to partner with a therapist to try to sort through some of these things and see if you can develop an understanding of how this came to be a part of your life. If you do choose to meet with a therapist, it might be a good idea to try to find someone who has some expertise in attentional issues. While it is possible that the issues you are describing are a natural part of some sort of a transition in your life or an indicator that a change is needed, it is also possible that something else is going on. Perhaps there is an undiagnosed attentional issue that could be identified and worked on or treated. A therapist with expertise in attentional issues will be able to help you distinguish between these possibilities and help you move to a place of greater peace and focus.

If you haven’t done so already, I also recommend seeing a doctor to rule out any possible medical causes.

Best wishes,
Sarah

Important Notice

GoodTherapy is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, medical treatment, or therapy. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding any mental health symptom or medical condition. Never disregard professional psychological or medical advice nor delay in seeking professional advice or treatment because of something you have read on GoodTherapy.